Table of Contents
Lie-Clocks – A Funny ESL Joke About Telling Lies
Lie-Clocks
A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he noticed a huge wall of clocks behind him.
He asked,
“What are all those clocks?”
St. Peter replied,
“Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has one. Each time you tell a lie, the hands on your clock move.”
The man pointed to one and asked,
“Whose clock is that?”
St. Peter answered,
“That’s Mother Teresa’s clock. The hands have never moved. She never told a lie.”
The man was amazed.
“And whose clock is that one?”
“That’s Abraham Lincoln’s. The hands have moved only twice. He told just two lies in his life.”
The man then asked,
“Where’s George Bush’s clock?”
St. Peter replied,
“It’s in Jesus’ office. He’s using it as a ceiling fan.”
Vocabulary & Notes for ESL Learners
| Word / Expression | Meaning |
|---|---|
| Pearly Gates | The entrance to heaven, often described in Christian stories. |
| St. Peter | A figure from Christian tradition who guards the entrance to heaven. |
| Lie-Clock | A fictional clock that moves every time a person lies. |
| Ceiling fan | A fan attached to the ceiling that cools a room. |
| Mother Teresa | A Catholic nun known for her honesty and charity. |
| Abraham Lincoln | A former U.S. president known for his honesty. |
| George Bush | A former U.S. president; used here for humorous political exaggeration. |
Comprehension Quiz – Lie-Clocks Joke
Part 1: Multiple Choice Questions
Choose the correct answers:
- 1Where does the story take place?
- A. On Earth
- B. In heaven
- C. In a courtroom
- D. In a library
- What happens to the Lie-Clock when someone lies?
- A. It breaks
- B. It rings
- C. The hands move
- D. It disappears
- Why has Mother Teresa’s clock never moved?
- A. It is broken
- B. She never told a lie
- C. She lost her clock
- D. She wasn’t in heaven
- What is Jesus using George Bush’s clock for?
- A. A joke
- B. A wall decoration
- C. A ceiling fan
- D. A timer
2. ✅ Correct answer: C
3. ✅ Correct answer: B
4. ✅ Correct answer: C
Part 2: True or False
Based on the joke above, decide whether these statements are true or false:
| Statement | True / False |
|---|---|
| 1. Everyone in heaven has a Lie-Clock. | ___ |
| 2. The hands on a Lie-Clock move when a person tells the truth. | ___ |
| 3. Abraham Lincoln’s clock has only moved twice. | ___ |
| 4. St. Peter is standing at the Pearly Gates. | ___ |
| 5. The man finds his own clock on the wall. | ___ |
| 6. The joke ends with a funny comment about George Bush’s clock. | ___ |
| 7. Jesus is using Mother Teresa’s clock as a fan. | ___ |
2. ✅ False
3. ✅ True
4. ✅ True
5. ✅ False
6. ✅ True
7. ✅ False
Part 3: Short Answer Questions
Answer these questions:
- What are Lie-Clocks used for in heaven?
→ … - How does the man react to learning about Mother Teresa’s clock?
→ … - Why is George Bush’s clock not on the wall?
→ …
→ To show how many lies a person has told.
2. How does the man react to learning about Mother Teresa’s clock?
→ He is amazed and says, “Incredible.”
3. Why is George Bush’s clock not on the wall?
→ Because Jesus is using it as a ceiling fan.
This joke is part of the politics category
