Table of Contents
Clean Jokes for English Learners – Computers Theme
1. Pre-Reading Activity: Vocabulary Matching
Match the words on the left with their definitions on the right.
| Vocabulary | Definitions |
|---|---|
| 1. Purgatory | a) Connected by chains or restraints |
| 2. Frolicking | b) A waiting place between Heaven and Hell in some beliefs |
| 3. Enticing | c) Playfully running or moving with joy |
| 4. Shackled | d) Something very unpleasant or shocking |
| 5. Tortured | e) Caused great physical or mental pain |
| 6. Ghastly | f) Extremely attractive or tempting |
| 7. Screen saver | g) An image or animation displayed on a screen when idle |
2. Frolicking → c) Playfully running or moving with joy
3. Enticing → f) Extremely attractive or tempting
4. Shackled → a) Connected by chains or restraints
5. Tortured → e) Caused great physical or mental pain
6. Ghastly → d) Something very unpleasant or shocking
7. Screen saver → g) An image or animation displayed on a screen when idle
2. Reading the Joke: Heaven or Hell?
Heaven or Hell?
Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God…
“Well, Bill, I’m really confused on this call. I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously
helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I’m going to do
something I’ve never done before. In your case, I’m going to let
you decide where you want to go!”
Bill replied, “Well, thanks, God. What’s the difference between the two?”
God said, “I’m willing to let you visit both places briefly if it will help you make a decision.”
Bill asked, “Fine, but where should I go first?”
God said, “I’m going to leave that up to you.”
Bill said, “OK, then, let’s try Hell first.” So Bill went to Hell.
It was a beautiful, clean, sandy beach with clear waters.
There were thousands of beautiful women running around, playing in the water, laughing, and frolicking about. The sun was shining and
the temperature was perfect.
Bill was very pleased. “This is great!” he told God, “If this is Hell, I REALLY want to see Heaven!”
“Fine,” said God, and off they went.
Heaven was a high place in the clouds, with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but not as enticing as Hell. Bill thought for a quick minute and rendered his decision.
“Hmm, I think I prefer Hell,” he told God.
“Fine,” retorted God, “as you desire.” So Bill Gates went to Hell.
Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how he was doing in Hell. When God arrived in Hell, he
found Bill shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons.
“How’s everything going, Bill?” God asked.
Bill responded – his voice full of anguish and disappointment, “This is awful, this is not what I expected. I can’t believe this
happened. What happened to that other place with the beaches and the beautiful women playing in the water?”
God says, “Ah! That was the screensaver.”
3. Comprehension Questions
A. Multiple Choice
Choose the right answer:
- Why was God unsure about sending Bill to Heaven or Hell?
- A. Because Bill was too young
- B. Because Bill had done both good and bad things
- C. Because Bill didn’t believe in God
- D. Because Heaven was full
- What did Bill see when he visited Hell for the first time?
- A. People crying
- B. A dark cave with demons
- C. A beautiful beach with happy people
- D. A computer lab
- Why did Bill choose to go to Hell?
- A. He didn’t like the music in Heaven
- B. Hell looked more fun
- C. God told him to
- D. He wanted to try something new
- What was the twist at the end of the story?
- A. Bill became an angel
- B. Bill was sent to Earth
- C. The fun version of Hell was just a screensaver
- D. Heaven and Hell were the same place
2. ✅ C
3. ✅ B
4. ✅ C
B. True or False
Based on the joke, decide whether these statements are true or false:
| Statement | True / False |
|---|---|
| 1. Bill Gates died in a plane crash. | ___ |
| 2. God allowed Bill to choose between Heaven and Hell. | ___ |
| 3. Bill preferred Heaven over Hell. | ___ |
| 4. In the end, Hell was full of sunshine and fun. | ___ |
| 5. The beach scene in Hell was fake. | ___ |
| 6. God chose Hell for Bill. | ___ |
| 7. Bill enjoyed his time in Hell. | ___ |
2. ✅ True
3. ✅ False
4. ✅ False
5. ✅ True
6. ✅ False – Not exactly – it was Bill’s choice, but with limited info
7. ✅ False
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